Three of our kids will be visiting us the last weekend in June, so I’ve been thinking about “family” over the past few days.  As a result, I’m also thinking about some things I’ve learned about families and relationships.

One of my perspectives of family came from a movie.  The two romantically involved main characters in My Big Fat Greek Wedding come from diametrically different family backgrounds.  At one point, the woman tells the man she is uncomfortable about her family and the way they behave.  The man responds by saying, “So your family’s weird.  Everybody’s family is weird.”  Hmmm.

I learned a way families get along from the TV series Everybody Loves Raymond.  Raymond’s mother is a stereotypical buttinski Mom.  (Wisconsin word for always putting her nose into everyone’s business.)  Mom does her usual interference routine at the wedding of her son, Robert, creating stress on the wedding day for several of the characters in the show, especially Robert.  In his role as the best man, Raymond makes a wedding toast to his brother and new sister-in-law.  In his toast, he refers to Mom’s actions of the day and mentions that “families edit.”  Family members know each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and they “edit” the less than perfect moments of family life, focusing instead on the strengths of the family unit.

One of my most valuable insights into relationships came from my Grandma Lorenzen, and it applies to people in general, not only family units.  Grandma had a plaque above the stove in her kitchen that said:  “All are queer but me and thee, and sometimes me thinks even thee.”  (Note:  This was in the 1950s, when common usage of the word queer meant “odd.”)  I’ve always thought this was good to remember, and I guess Grandma thought so too.